The Change.

I'm a bum, I think I've already made that pretty clear, but I'm a bum who doesn't make any excuses. Maybe I do sometimes, but the point I want to make is that I'm trying not to. I know it's wrong leading the life that I have, I'm so comfortable, living off others and not really trying to get my shit together. Sometimes it makes me feel less of a man, than I would if I had a job. But then again, I think I'm on to something, something big. Change is coming to me, slowly, but I can feel it. I've started to think again, evolve and read. I feel like I'm growing each day, in a way that others don't, because they go to the work they hate, watching television they didn't choose and make love to strangers just to boost their ego.

By this blog (or whatever) I'm not saying that I am better than anyone else, just different, as it should be, we're all unique bla, bla, bla.

On the other hand I'm always looking for ways to be reborn, like a spiritual cleansing kind of thing, a new me in the same skin. Truth is, you never change, you might to a certain degree or during a certain amount of time, but you always slip into the same as you were. And I hope that I'll stop trying some day, stop trying to be something that I'm clearly not, stop trying to grow up, stop trying to fit into suits, stop trying to make a mature hairdo, stop trying to convince myself that I anything but myself.

Although things change all the time, cities grow, people die and countries get raped by bigger ones. The world changes all the time, but your life span isn't long enough to see it happen. That's why it feels so futile. To wait for a murderous war to end, to wait for Marijuana to be legalized, to wait for a new world order. Not THE new world order...

But I digress, starting tomorrow I'm going to stop trying to change. (Isn't that changing per cé?)